Fantastic document Driver:2tsup:
It should be taught in schools
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Fantastic document Driver:2tsup:
It should be taught in schools
G'day Brother Committee Member Waldo,Quote:
Originally Posted by Waldo
Excellent suggestion. Shed Scientist's work should be more widely recognised and you've found a way to do it. If Shed Scientist should read this perhaps he could give us an opinion?
Bout bluddy time.
:wave::roflmao::coolio::lolol::yourock2::wtg::groupwave::lb::rotfl::yippy::clap3::hahaha::thewave::rotfl::roflmao2::clap2::woot::bgth::hooray::yes::brava:)(
Bloody Ripper !
thank you all
thanx all for writing such a great document:2tsup:
Following some recent correspondence on the vexed question of whether or not a bloke should loan tools to another bloke or blokes, our septic mate, Honorary Bloke, suggested that The Code needed to cover this important and potentially touchy subject. Accordingly, The Code has been updated to include a new section (para 6.5: Borrowing and lending tools - a touchy subject).
Honorary Bloke has been added to the list of Drafting Committee members on page 30. (Thanks for the input, Bob :D )
As is customary with Code updates, changes to the text have been highlighted in yellow.
Blokes are advised to familiarise themselves with the updates so as to avoid potential Code violations.
Dontha reckon the C of P has got so big its become THE rule book? :rolleyes:
Yet the Code prohibits reading any instructions. :2tsup:
So is the Code gunna fly away with the Woop Woop Bird? :D
Read it again, mate. It's not a manual. It's The Code.Quote:
Originally Posted by echnidna
Quote:
"Para 5 The Shed
What a bloke does in his shed is up to him ...."
If you want to make The Code fly away from your shed, that's your choice.
However:
Quote:
Para 5 The Shed
"If a bloke chooses to ignore this guidance, well, he has that right but it would be a foolish bloke who knowingly transgresses The Code and commits a violation."
:wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :cool: :cool:
Naturally my instinctive blokelyness did not allow me to actually read the whole code (i did however skim parts here and there).
Now! There did not appear to be any mention of curtains. Obviously curtains would NOT allowed even under threat of complete withdrawl of conjiguls curtains would not be allowed but can an exemption could be granted in this case.
The sun, in the afternoon is glaring in through the one window I have in my shed, making visibility quite difficult at my workbench. As i see it my options are:
1. Knock off for the day and have a beer
2. Go to the pub.
3. Nail a couple of hessian wheat bags to the framing above the window as a temporary measure.
Also if i go with 3. should I use flat head nails or bullet heads but only nailed halfway in and then bent over to stop the bags sliding off.
I've got the same problem in my office (which is in the back of the shed). I got an old drawer and stuck it up on the inside of the window. Problem solved in a half-arsed blokely way :wink:
Quote:
Originally Posted by silentC
IS there any other way? As blokes we are condemned to have to live, breath and think like this.
But do we complain? No:no:
Often we are criticised for these very traits by the fairer sex.
If they realised the pain that is caused by the dilemma of perfectionist vs blokeyness then surely we would see more empathy.:)
PS I hope you have removed those curtains Cliff.
Been gone for a while now, one was covering a window where I needed to put a fan & the other was on the window in the wall than got clobbered by Larry. (Saved me a job. :p )Quote:
Originally Posted by Bleedin Thumb
Please note how they are carefully stored.
Superb. Excellent thread. The Code is just great. Well, from what I could tell in a quick glance anyway. Thanks to all who contributed.
:2tsup: :2tsup: :2tsup:
Oh great and wonderous wood butchers, yes yea who have created this document of knowledge, let me bow before you, and humbly offer up my words of wisdom.:bowdown: :bowdown:
Let no bloke with multi coloured hair enter my shed. Let blokes only have hair the colour that the big man intended.
Let no discussion be entered into about hairstyles, or so called "product" (other than brill cream) within the confines of said shed. Such product that is needed to keep ones hair out of ones eyes shall be obtained by such blokey behavior as spitting on ones hand or in absolute emergencies see the film "there is something about Mary"
While at the barber shop, let no bloke utter more than "short back and sides" Any more discussion with the barber about hairstyles shall be deemed chappish, and will probably be followed by accepting fruity drinks with umbrellas in them.
Furthermore, unless absolutely certain of ones blokely stature, a mullet shall be considered to be a health hazard and shall be removed by any safety consious mate as soon as possible.
Thank you o oderous men of the wood for allowing my submission.
:2tsup:
Hey, I think "Number 3 please" is OK as well :1eye:Quote:
Originally Posted by Thickasaplank
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thickasaplank
That's what a bandsaw's for :oo::2tsup:
Rob
OK... most of this has already been covered by other sections of The Code.
I would like to draw you attention to following:-
4.2. The purpose of a shed.
The purpose of a shed is to provide an environment and territory wherein a bloke has total and complete dominion and control and is therefore happy.
See the first paragraph of this section....
5. The Shed
What a bloke does in his shed is up to him (see para 3 – Definitions, sub para 3.2 – Shed and para 4 – Purposes, sub para 4.2 – The purpose of a shed). It is clear from these important sections of the Code of Practice that a bloke has complete control over all activities within his own shed. This is inviolable. However, the Code is designed to provide appropriate guidance (see para 1 – Scope). What follows in this section is intended to provide a bloke with some clear guidance. If a bloke chooses to ignore this guidance, well, he has that right but it would be a foolish bloke who knowingly transgresses the Code and commits a violation.
See also:
5.15. Hospitality. A bloke should make provision for entertaining his mates.
So, if you don't like his hair, he probably isn't your mate anyway so you don't have to be hospitable to him. Problem solved. :2tsup:
Brylbloodycream?? Get a flamin grip!! that went out with the dinosaurs mate! its Californian Poppy all the way mate!! slicks back slicker than a wet chick flat on her back :2tsup:Quote:
Originally Posted by Thickasaplank
I have always thought that mullets were the ultimate expression of Blokeness in that Woman generally hate them they are a throwback to a gentler Era:roll: when most blokes couldn't even spell political correctness let alone attempt to interpret feeling emotions and stuff. Plus finally they generally look appalling!! You can't get more blokey that that surely??Quote:
Originally Posted by Thickasaplank
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thickasaplank
GentsQuote:
Originally Posted by MarkV
At the risk of appearing a tad over-conscientious, I should point out to you that the correct blokely term is "blokely".
"Blokey" is an expression used by SWMBOs and other non-blokes to describe activities engaged in by blokes. It's an expression which is only ever used by said SWMBOs when they wish to denigrate our blokely pursuits. Use by a bloke of this non-blokely expression doesn't automatically constitute a Code violation but I urge you to caution.
Col the Cautionary
G'day Col, where have you been? :)
G'day Cliff
I've been here all along, mate. A bit busy however. Some mates asked me to help them start up a new business. It needs my full-time involvement for several months and I'm starting at around 4.00 am every day.
Good fun but very time-consuming!
Col
Struth! What are you doing? Writing a code of practice for a bakery? :D
No - but now you mention it .......:wink:Quote:
Originally Posted by Cliff Rogers
Actually, I've noticed the bakers are just about the only people who are already awake by the time I'm on my way to work (at the fruit and veg markets, by the way).
Lemme guess.. you're doing temp work as the futch-up fairy, running around visiting various woodies' sheds in the wee hours, loosening screws on equipment, changing the clamping positions on overnight glue-ups and shortening one leg out of every four?
G'day,Quote:
Originally Posted by Skew ChiDAMN!!
If that's what's been goin' on, then no wonder Dingo has been having all this grief over his thicknesser. Damn Stuff-up Fairies.
Hmmm... yeah... both in WA... more fuel for my suspicions!
It'd be nice to have something in the Code banning these fairies from our sheds, but I'm not sure whether they can read. They certainly ignore the plans I leave next to my pieces when I lock up for the day!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skew ChiDAMN!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Waldo
You blokes need to read the Code again and stop believing in fairies! :rolleyes:Quote:
Originally Posted by Skew ChiDAMN!!
Cock-ups are not just unavoidable, they're compulsory. A bloke doesn't need fairies to help him create a cock-up, he's perfectly capable of getting there all on his own.
Pizz fairies on the other hand, are a different story. :cool:Quote:
Originally Posted by Driver
Please could the Code be updated to include allowance for the use of 'internal security window covers' as this would mean curtains are definitely never allowed in sheds.
Thanks
Wendy
Inventor of the Internal Security Window Cover trend:rolleyes:
Nope, can't do that.
But yer can hang cleaning rags over the windows
I am amazed where did you guys get the time to creat the worlds best CODE this is exceptionally a one off document :2tsup::2tsup::2tsup::2tsup:
I only had time to skim WOW
I have created a PDF and willing to forward it to anyone if they'd prefer or if there is an area it can be permenantly posted to its just 175kb
or should i just attache it
Perhaps if they were cleaning rags that had been cleaned and hung to dry ready for re-use. You couldn't call 'em curtains though, that wouldn't be right.Quote:
Originally Posted by echnidna
Quote:
Originally Posted by rufflyrustic
Quote:
Originally Posted by echnidna
Curtains!?!???! Did someone mention curtains? Surely not!Quote:
Originally Posted by Groggy
Wendy, you can't mean those french polishing rubber cloths that you have hanging down the RH side of your new shed, can you? I mean, they're not curtains. They can't be because it's an immutable Law of Shed Physics, as you know, that any piece of cloth present in the shed, unless it forms part of a bloke's blokely attire, can and will be taken down and used to wipe up stuff, apply stuff, clean up stuff, smear stuff around, soak up stuff and generally play a part in stuff - including stuff-ups.
Curtains, I mean to say! Per-lease!!!
Theres no rule about cleanin cloths not being frilly an lacey
just don't tell anyone there yours, Right Echnida? :oo: :p :D
Carn Guys - but they're there to keep prying eyes out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Surely under shed security they'd be allowed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
mumble, mumble....... :kickcan:
I dunno, You people. :no:
Surely everybody knows they're really tack cloths? They're ideally positioned and all! You just take the piece you want to clean over into the better light by the window and there they are... all ready to remove those last few offending specks of dust. :D
'Swhat I was sayin'. See, Wendy. We knew they weren't curtains.Quote:
Originally Posted by Skew ChiDAMN!!
Curtains! C'mon.....!
Security blinds! That's not bad, ya can't have ya tools being perved on by the great unwashed out there. Now you're getting the idea. :2tsup:Quote:
Originally Posted by rufflyrustic
I think all glass coatings/covers/security should only be as applied by the friendly shed spiders collecting dust and creating a lovely non see through haze or that mud/slobber and fresh blood mix as applied by a large black dog trying to look through the window but not realising his nose really is that long.
Ruffly,
The pieces of fabric in question are not, in my opinion, Code violations as such. To whit:
5.4 Decoration. Decoration of a shed is very important as it expresses a bloke’s personality and character. Decoration of the shed can include but shall not be limited to: old number plates, tin signs, tool stickers, calendars, charts, photos, posters, drawings, coasters, cobwebs (see para 5.4 Cobwebs) old bottles, old cans, old jars, old footballs and other superannuated sporting paraphernalia (no self-respecting shed is entirely complete without a bent and twisted wooden-framed tennis or squash racquet with busted real-gut strings) & information leaflets on every conceivable subject known to Man.
This leaves a lot of leeway for personal decisions. I believe we may safely posit that fabric hung on a wall (whether or not a window is present) is well within the rights of the bloke as it is his shed (please substitute sheila and gender-specific pronouns as necessary). Therefore, I submit to Driver (who is, after all the final arbiter in disputes of this sort) that so long as the fabric in question is not openly referred to as a "curtain" or as "lacy" but simply as part of the decoration of the shed (or perhaps as a safety device to protect your tools), that you are on safe ground.