The Rip in the Fabric of the Universe ...

[Iain]

be returned to Michael Praetoreous as he will find a use for the glog wearing terpsichorians in his piece.
Poof......................

[Caliban]

the magic dragon may as well make a cameo here, seeing as how anyone from any time (or space) seems to end up in this tale (or tail, depending on your sexual preference).
So Reg Gasnier, still clad in his football boots from his grandfinal win in nineteen seventy something stood blinking in stupified wonderment (because his pantaloons had also been nicked) when...

[echnidna]

... all of a sudden the tingling of some familar music resounded everywhere...
then a Mr Whippy van came into sight....

[Grunt]

and what a sight it was.
Everyone thinks that Mr Whippy was named thus because he sells soft server ice cream but it was because of his propensity to ...

[Harry72]

Been here for 7mths and this is the 1st time I've read and joined in this epic adventure, so here goes!


... do the whippy dance over public toilet bowls, but alas his knee's are all but worn out from all this whippy dancing much to the astonishment of Mother Farcquar who said...

[Iain]

Farq, what are you lot doing.
Realising her mistake, it was too late for the Late Graham Kennedy legal team emerged from the Mr Whippy van and issued her with a writ (with crushed nuts), Mother Farcquar responded.................

[echnidna]

I want a double header

[HappyHammer]

..heavy on the chocolate sauce and nuts...

[Driver]

There was a sudden loud tearing noise. It was the Rip, of course.

Halfway across the main deck a leg appeared, closely followed by the rest of a nerdy looking bloke in a white coat with a pocket full of small spanners and screwdrivers. Yes! It was Halfrit Sponcracker, chief techo of the Nemo Corporation. He was followed by a bunch of familiar looking droids.

Sponcracker spotted Roger (VC and Bar) lying in the scuppers, apparently winded from his unseemly encounter with the Mother F's forearm. He leaned over the former cabin boy:

"Decided I prefer it on this side of the Rip. Anyway, got to find my old boss, Glorsprang Nemo. By the way, why are you lying, apparently winded, in the scuppers?"

Roger remembered the ease with which the droids had previously handled the Mother Farcquar.

"Do me a favour, will you? Get your droids to toss that big fat Mother Farcquar over the taffrail. Then I'll help you find your penguin."

"Consider it done," said Sponcracker. Pointing at the lead droid, he said: "Heave that fat Mother Farcquar over the taffrail, there's a good droid"

There followed a scuffle, a couple of unseemly yelps, a great deal of lycra-clad wobbling flesh, a couple of boinging and spronging noises as bits of droid were detached from their owners, a pause and a very loud splash.

"Thank you," said Roger, as Sponcracker organised the reassembly of two or three of his robots. "That's hopefully the last we'll see of that fat Mother Farcquar."

(Dear Reader, we know he's dreaming but let's allow the poor sap a few moments of triumph ).

Just then ...

[echnidna]

...the Mr Whippy Van came round the corner again and...

[craigb]

This was very curious because clearly ships don't have corners. Well, at least not any that a Mr Whippy van can come around anyway.

Obviously there was a misprint in Sally's book and instead of it being the Mr Whippy van, it should have read that it was the Mr Whippy Man.

Now Mr Whippy man was a truely terrifying sight, clad as he was on Oxford St bondage gear and brandishing a rather large stock whip.

He advanced on Roger (VC &C) and said ....

[Iain]

like a cone thweetie?
Ye Gods, he looked familiar, it was Mother Farcqars anorexic brother Thethil.
Roger (VC,Bar and numerous other accoutrements) paled in horror as he realised that Mother Farcqar was going to be missed (or mithed) by Thethil.
'Weerth my darling cutie little sister?' he crooned.
Roger was unable to reply for he saw what was emerging back over the taffrail, it was..........................

[Caliban]

a none too happy MF (not MFKL) who seemed to have run foul of a Japanese Whaling ship and was sporting several harpoons as a trophy.She was about to rip a new @#$ehole for Roger when she spied her brother.
Her joy was a sight to behold as she...

[Driver]

...plucked out a harpoon and playfully batted her brother across the head with it.

Thethil promptly shot across the poop deck and crashed into several members of the Hole In The Drawers Collective. These unfortunates had (collectively) stepped out from behind the binnacle when they received the good news about the MF's plunge into the briny.

They had also (collectively) donned the purloined pair of the Mother Farcquar's enormous cami-knickers preparatory to performing a jubilant and joyful jig.

Thethil's crashing into them forced a swift reappraisal of their plans. They (collectively) peeped out of the cami-knickers through a strategically positioned orifice, just in time to see something utterly dreadful. Yes! It was herself, bearing down upon them, a murderous glint in her ...

[Iain]

admonished Hovo for referring to her as MF...............
'Cecil' she shrieked, 'how I have missed you'.
Thethil wath horrified (c'mon Driver, better than Fronch) and replied 'Thith, long time no thee'
They immediately embraced in what proved to be a fatal act of sibling affection for Thethil, his poor limp lifeless body dangling in the bosom of MF.
'IAIN'she screamed, 'you'll be in as much poo as Hovo if this MF keeps up'and with that she...............