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Thread: Heaven
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12th July 2006, 06:56 PM #1
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Heaven
An Aussie dies and goes to heaven.
As he stands in front of the pearly gates, he sees a huge wall of clocks behind him.
"What area all the clocks for?" he asks St. Peter,
"They are lie clocks. Everyone has one and the hands move each time you lie" replies Peter.
"Oh" says the aussie "Who’s clock is that?"
"Thats Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved therefore telling us that she had never lied in her life. Next to that is Abraham Lincolns it has only moved twice telling us he has only lied twice in his lifetime" explains Peter.
The aussie is stunned he continues to look for a few minutes then asks peter "Where is John Howard’s clock?"
"Its in Jesus’ office" exclaims Peter, "He is using it for a ceiling fan
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13th July 2006, 07:17 PM #2
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13th July 2006, 08:53 PM #3
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I thought it was funny and I voted for the rodent. Didn't have much choice considering the alternative.
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13th July 2006, 09:48 PM #4
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I even considerd voting for Fred Nile, so I didnt have to vote for him.
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.
My Other Toys
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13th July 2006, 11:08 PM #5
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Was it a joke? I thought you were serious....
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13th July 2006, 11:20 PM #6
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13th July 2006, 11:33 PM #7
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So dead on the nail that no further comment was really necessary.
John
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13th July 2006, 11:59 PM #8
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Old joke, the names have been changed a bit over the years.
Originally Posted by echnidna
Cliff.
If you find a post of mine that is missing a pic that you'd like to see, let me know & I'll see if I can find a copy.
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14th July 2006, 08:49 AM #9
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Your a brave man for admitting that!.. how many reddies have you got since your post Originally Posted by Coldamus
I try and do new things twice.. the first time to see if I can do it.. the second time to see if I like it
Kev
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14th July 2006, 09:49 AM #10
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Funny? - yes
True? - unfortunately very much so!!! :mad:
bye bye johnny.....
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14th July 2006, 10:18 AM #11
The rain is horizontal???
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Brudda, I thought he voted for Mickey Mouse.
A ' rodent' ??? I doubt I could be quite so nice about it...
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14th July 2006, 10:59 AM #12
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Would like to point out the fact that all ceiling fans rotate anti-clockwise.
Visit my website at www.myFineWoodWork.com
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14th July 2006, 12:06 PM #13
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Schtoo, Originally Posted by Schtoo
A ' rodent' ??? I doubt I could be quite so nice about it...
Being overseas, you probably miss some of the political scandals here. One of little Johnnie's own senators allegedly referred to him as a "lying rodent" and the tag has stuck, basically because he lives up to it so well. See here for details:
http://www.theage.com.au/articles/20...?from=storyrhs
regards
Coldamus
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14th July 2006, 02:04 PM #14
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Another picky bugger. Originally Posted by Wongo
Would like to point out the fact that all ceiling fans rotate anti-clockwise.
Cliff.
If you find a post of mine that is missing a pic that you'd like to see, let me know & I'll see if I can find a copy.
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14th July 2006, 02:35 PM #15
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