Nurther Olddybutgoodie

[guest]

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a litre of Life milk, a carton of eggs, a litre of orange juice, a head of iceberg lettuce, a can of coffee, and a 500gm. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single." The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?" The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

[Tikki]

Like the drunk wouldn't be fugly himself???

[Gingermick]

Everyone knows that when a man he is drunk he is irresistable to the opposite sex.
Therefore a drunk, by definition, cannot be fugly.

[Tikki]

Everyone knows that when a man he is drunk he is irresistable to the opposite sex.
Therefore a drunk, by definition, cannot be fugly.

You're obviously not a female!

[Auld Bassoon]

Just a realist

[Auld Bassoon]

Just a realist

Just donning the flame-proof trousers now

[Ashore]

But in the morning the drunk will not be drunk ( as the old winston churchil quote says), or was it oscar wilde, forget now must be intoxicated,

Ps Tikki you asked for these jokes with your attack on the male members of this forum with your new assault of pro female jokes.


Rgds
Russell




Useless infomation for the day

Man who farts in church sit in his own pew.

[Auld Bassoon]

Man who farts in church sit in his own pew.

Man who wants his own pew must, therefore...

Cheers!

PS Ashore, what's your source of these little gems, or do you just make them up as whimsy takes?

[Tikki]

Ps Tikki you asked for these jokes with your attack on the male members of this forum with your new assault of pro female jokes

This IS the jokes section and they ARE jokes ... nothing personal. Lighten up Russell

Cheers
Tikki

[doug the slug]

Like the drunk wouldn't be fugly himself???

Damn, my latest lot of home brew doesnt have a decent head on it, sure looks fugly ......... but im gonna drink it anyway.

[scooter]

Was there ever any doubt Doug?


Cheers...........Sean, beer goggles