Scotch with two drops of water.

[KBs PensNmore]

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, 'I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today.'


The bartender says, 'Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink.In fact, this one is on me.' As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, 'I would like to buy you a drink, too.'


The old woman says, 'Thank you.


Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water.' 'Coming up,' says the bartender.




As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, 'I would like to buy you one, too.' The old woman says, 'Thank you.


Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water.'


'Coming right up,' the bartender says. As he gives her the drink, he says, 'Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?'


The old woman replies, 'Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor. Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue.'

[AlexS]

At last! A new joke on the internet!

[A Duke]

Water, a little of which can spoil a lot of Scotch.
Regards

[Chesand]

Water is fine but it can rust your kidneys.

[Crunchie]

A tour of the distilleries in Scotland would soon teach you that scotch should be tasted with 2 drops of water. Try it as a "blind" tasting and you will probably be amazed at the difference it makes.

[KBs PensNmore]

My brother used to drink Scotch and Coke, he'd get crook, then he tried rum and Coke, he'd get crook, Port and Coke, again he'd get crook. He reckoned that the common thing amongst it all was the Coke, so he then used to drink it neat.
He didn't get crook any more, only problem was when he got cremated, it took 2 days to put the fire out.

[damian]

As a lifelong whisky drinker there was a time when people thought adding anything to a single malt was heresy. Apparently teh thing now is to start neat and as you say add a little water with each sip. I do have to admit it brings out complexity I'd not tasted before.

Unhappily I've had a niggling cough for a few months now, so I'm "forced" to have a few drinks each night for purely medicinal reasons.

[Chesand]

Unhappily I've had a niggling cough for a few months now, so I'm "forced" to have a few drinks each night for purely medicinal reasons.

That's your excuse and you are stuck with it now.

[woodPixel]

... I've had a niggling cough for a few months now, so I'm "forced" to have a few drinks each night for purely medicinal reasons.

Well, I wish you a long and serious illness that requires extensive medication.

[Handyjack]

I hope your cough has nothing to do with something starting with Carona...

[damian]

It started when I started cleaning out the garage. Lots of dust, much of it made by vermin. I've had these before and they linger. Blessed bother.

But if you drink enough it either cures your cough or you stop caring.

[AlexS]

It's not the cough that carries you off, it's the coffin they carry you off in.