What the heck is wrong with the Middle aged of today???

I ask really what is wrong with a good Middle aged second childhood, a good old fashioned return to your youth, some of you guys carry on like it's a crime to be or act youthfull and behave in a irresponsible manner......well why not I say, trade the falcon wagon in on a little red sports car, a toupee' ;) a permanent booking at the day spa, and while we're at it, why the hell not trade that tired old SWMBO in on a fresher newer one :p .
Why not it's what the previous generation did en'mass if it was good enough for them, who are we to argue. :D


Bruce C.
In the interests of my own and other respondents personal safety, wellbeing and relationships & to help ensure no legal action results, the above is a piece of satire, leaning towards the darker side of comedy, and in no way reflects mine or any other forum members actual intention towards our better(much much better my love really) halves.

Bloody hell Bruce, just when my heart was starting to thump at the thought of someone else doing the same stupid thing I did at around 40 you go and ruin my pleasant dreams by wimping out at the end with the disclaimer. :(

Oh well, I'll just add it on to the many other disapointments in life. :D

You did have me going though. :D

Is there a better look than a middle aged balding bloke driving around in an expensive open topped sports car?

Possibly only surpassed by the fat middle aged bloke with a comb over and a trophy wife.

:p :p ;) :D :D

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Originally Posted by craigb

Possibly only surpassed by the fat middle aged bloke with a comb over and a trophy wife....

:p :p ;) :D :D

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...dressed in skin-tight lycra (the bloke, that is) riding a racing bike that costs only slightly more than a Porsche...

And don't forget that with the skin-tight lycra comes the groovy cyclist's helmet - which has the useful side benefit of holding the rug down!

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Originally Posted by E. maculata

well why not I say, trade the falcon wagon in on a little red sports car,

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I've got both a falcon wagon AND a red MG :D
Mind you, I can't afford to register the MG and she's waiting to be sold to pay for the falchoon :(

And no-one can tell that I'm a fat, balding, middle aged bloke when I drive the MG because you can't see my tum from outside and I always wear a hat :D

Richard

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Originally Posted by Daddles

and I always wear a hat :D

Richard

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Well that's a dead giveaway for a start :p :D :D

I used to work with this guy. He was probably in his 30's and he was starting to lose his hair. He used to grow it long at the back and then comb it up around the sides and on top, holding it in place with copious amounts of hair gel or something. This was bad enough but the other thing he used to do was to paint his head black with something (probably shoe polish). Sometimes it had comb marks in it. Now I'm the last person to poke at someone who is loosing their hair, seeing as mine is well on the way, but I could not help laughing whenever I saw him. I really think he thought no-one noticed.

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Originally Posted by Daddles

and I always wear a hat :D
Richard

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I imagine that you would have to drive quite slowly with the top down?

(Unless I'm mistaken and it's not a terry towling hat :eek: )

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Originally Posted by E. maculata

why the hell not trade that tired old SWMBO in on a fresher newer one :p .

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I'm with you on all the rest Bruce, but in answer to this one: I couldn't stand the retraining! :eek: :eek: :eek:

Cheers,

P (whose nails look really spesh!)
:D

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Originally Posted by silentC

This was bad enough but the other thing he used to do was to paint his head black with something (probably shoe polish). Sometimes it had comb marks in it.

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:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

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Originally Posted by Gingermick

I imagine that you would have to drive quite slowly with the top down?

(Unless I'm mistaken and it's not a terry towling hat :eek: )

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Actually, it's a baseball type cap and carries the legend - 'Throw sticks, not stones. Boomerangs forever'. That hat stays on at over 80mph ... not that I've ever tested that ya realise :rolleyes:

Richard

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Originally Posted by Daddles

Actually, it's a baseball type cap and carries the legend - 'Throw sticks, not stones. Boomerangs forever'. That hat stays on at over 80mph ... not that I've ever tested that ya realise :rolleyes:

Richard

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Of course not, 80MPH in an MG? In your dreams you suicidal maniac. :D

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Originally Posted by Daddles

Actually, it's a baseball type cap

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Do you wear it backwards?:D

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Originally Posted by bitingmidge

I'm with you on all the rest Bruce, but in answer to this one: I couldn't stand the retraining! :eek: :eek: :eek:

Cheers,

P (whose nails look really spesh!)
:D

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I hate being retrained as well.

Hats. Lights. Bloody Volvo drivers!

Bruce.. to answer your question "What the heck is wrong with the Middle aged of today???"

I am compelled to say that the thing wrong with the middle aged of today is

I'm THERE!!!!!!! :eek: :eek: :eek:

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Originally Posted by E. maculata

...and while we're at it, why the hell not trade that tired old SWMBO in on a fresher newer one...

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What! Do you have any idea how long it takes to properly fettle a new wife? I'm still working on the first one after 19 years. The soul lays flat but I can't get the mouth to close up. Funny thing, even with a wide open mouth it can cut right to the heart-wood with one swipe when it wants to.:D:D:D

Ahh Kev, the ranks of the middle aged improved dramatically once you and I joined them :D

Grumps
Richard

and NO Mick, I do NOT wear that ruddy hat BACKWARDS :mad:

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Originally Posted by Groggy

What! Do you have any idea how long it takes to properly fettle a new wife? I'm still working on the first one after 19 years. The soul lays flat but I can't get the mouth to close up. Funny thing, even with a wide open mouth it can cut right to the heart-wood with one swipe when it wants to.:D:D:D

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I think you're confusing the fettler with the fettlee :D

I'd like to think that I'm middle aged.....but sometimes I'm a bit of an optimist :D

I've still got my hair and when I had my Z3 there was no air disturbance at any speed, even the heater worked with the top off and the rain went straight across the top.
Time to get rid of the MG Mr S :D :D :D

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Originally Posted by Iain

Time to get rid of the MG Mr S :D :D :D

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Yeah, you're probably right. I've had a MkII, I've had a GT and now I've got a Rubbenose. It'd be nice to go back to the MkII with wire wheels and overdrive. Yeah, you're right, it's time to start planning my next MGB.

Seriously, losing the old girl has been on the cards for the last 12 months. The thought upsets my son and I keep telling him that if we do have to sell her, it'll only be so that when the divorce is finally settled and I get some money, we'll be able to buy a better one. :D Mind you, a house comes first ... er... no it doesn't, the ruddy lawyer's come first, then the hovel - MG somewhere well down the list :(

Cheers
Richard

The old saying about MGs, invented with the T series but still true with the B types, was Boiled Feet and Frozen Brains :eek:

Richard

Don't you just love the old farts that finally get the sports car that they always dreamed of and then are not even game enough to do the speed limit cause its a bit too fast for them.
Cheers
Barry

Spoken like a true Canberran, Baz!

Enjoy life Bruce :) :) :) :) :) :)