So what's all this about, then?

"'ello" thought Crabtree "there appears to be zee echo". Who is zee narrator I am wandering ..

... all over the plot!"

A voice said: "Ello, 'ello!"

"Thor's thit eecho agoon," said the Captoon.

"No, no lad," intoned a portly British bobby. "That's a standard policeman's greeting. One halways sez: "Ello, 'ello" before interrogating a suspect."

"Er you implaying thit I'm a sospuct?" said Crabtree ...

"Oh no," exclaimed the bobby, whose name was Bobby, "you're not just a suspect, China, we know you done it. We've got you bang to rights. You're in the frame, you've been grassed up. It's not going to go pear-shaped this time because I've had a word in my Governor's shell-like ear, and shortly you'll be doing porridge, you horrible little Frenchman"

"Bugger Me!" said Crabtree in French and Bobby proceeded to ...

look up his French to English dictionary.

"Right sunshine" he said when he'd worked out the translation "you're nicked and I'm going to add offensive language to your form sheet as well".

However just then, the lovely Michelle intervened, telling Bobby .....

McGee every song she ever knew..with ....

..out including Knees up mother brown and roll out the barrell (I love stereo types). Enraged by the omission of these two classics Bobby called on his mate Barb (I'm still living off of my Carry On fame) Windsor to teach this trans gender ludite a lesson in how to have a kness up, Barb started by....

calling on her famous cousin Elizabeth Windsor to...

observe the goings on and point the knees up group in the right direction. "Well, well, well" said the Bobby, before he could continue the Frenchman said " Oui! I know zat one, it is zee chain of ponds ne ce pas?"
With that the Bobby grabbed his night stick off Michelle and was about to clobber the frog when the night stick began to vibrate "Farkenelle! said the Bobby"
Again the frenchman interupted with " Oo, OO, OO, i know zat one too, it's distant waterway , oui? This time the Bobby really spat the dummy and clocked the frog right in the .......

Wooden door of his wooden outhouse which was situated in the woods just outside the wooden gates of his wooden chateau just down the road from......

the call centre, where at that very moment thousands of furrowed brows were pouring over Australian telephone books, feverishly finding fone (sorry!) numbers to dial while the evening meal time was apon them.

One of their number, a thick skinned, thick set individual with wood-rimmed glasses, looked up suddenly...

stuff this nonsense ... who wants a bourbon and .....

wooded chardonnay in a wooden ...

unused...

virginal.......