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He promptly commissioned Alexander the orthotist (who had a penchant to wittling) with such exotics as, Ebony, Lignum Vitae and Deer antler. The brief outlined the need for the two lost digits "To articulate as close as possible to the real thing" colour not important. His first thought was to contact.......
A well noted carver of some renown to fashion the missing digits as a model to replace Monicas now unsightly hand that once took the nation by the throat and shook it to its core.
"You beaut" she cried upon seeing the now elegant replacement fingers carved from the most elegant wood known to the carver and whose expertise was second to none in the land."You have fashioned my fingers like no other but coudn't you have kept them together instead apart,why its as if I'm giving everybody my own salute."she cried in exasperation.
The carver being the kindly soul that he was said,"My dear Monica I know how you like a cigar and I'm merely providing you with the means to enjoy this passion of yours."
"You have only to keep your hand in your pocket when you have no use of it."
Suddenly, a great mass of noodly appendages appeared in the sky. My God, said Monica, is that the Flying Spaghetti Monster?
No..... it was Mrs. Mopp-it up in the sky, her bearded legs writhing in pain as her loosly knitted alpaca cardigan slowly unravelled.
"......What are you doing flying again?" she called, " I though you had been struck off."