The Rip in the Fabric of the Universe ...

thought about saying "bugger me."
But, through bitter experience, he knew better. Instead he...

decided that all contributors to this thread were indeed very sick puppies...........

.... and needed worming.

"Well children" sighed Sally, as she closed the book. "wasn't that a long and very silly chapter?"

"It sure was miss" piped up little Johnny "they never seem to get of that f*****g boat!"

"Johnny!" exclaimed Sally, "how many times have I told you to ....

it's not a f*****g boat, it's a f*****g ship.
With that she re opened the book and told them to move onto the next chapter.
Seaman Staines was standing in the crows nest looking toward the deck when he spotted something strange, which was not unusual for this tale, this however was....................

worse than having Klingons off the starboard bow, or bats in the belfry, or any number of overused and much abused cliches that this story seems plagued with. Or should I have written "with which this story is plagued"?
Anyway, I digress, which is just about par for this course. Speaking of which, the captain gave orders to set the course for...

Uranus.

Roger the Cabin boy groaned "Not again!" and turned towards ...

Number One. Who cried "Aye Aye Cap'n. But begging your pardon sir, was it the rings around Uranus that you were wanting me to steer for first?"

Nemo fixed him with a steely glare and said ....

"Look out, here comes Fellatio Hornblower"

Nemo was right because though the rip in the fabric of the universe came Fellatio Hornblower dressed in ...

nothing but a goatskin cape and .....

a pair of Argyle golf socks.

And a Bellingham fire dept shirt and a foil lined cap, a silly expression on his face and an empty wallet. He would have had a low angle jack plane but recent complications had left him way too confused, so instead he was carrying a...

bucket full of ...

yabbys

holding rosary beads.......................