Duck Plasterer

A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.

The barman looks at him and says, "Hang on! You're a duck."

"I see your eyes are working," replies the duck.

"And you can talk!" exclaims the barman.

"I see your ears are working, too," says the duck. "Now if you
don't mind, can I have my beer and my sandwich please?"

"Certainly, sorry about that," says the barman as he pulls the
duck's pint. "It's just we don't get many ducks in this pub. What
are you doing round this way?"

"I'm working on the building site across the road," explains the
duck. "I'm a plasterer."

The flabbergasted barman cannot believe the duck and wants to learn
more, but takes the hint when the duck pulls out a newspaper from
his bag and proceeds to read it.

So, the duck reads his paper, drinks his beer, eats his sandwich,
bids the barman good day and leaves.

The same thing happens for two weeks.

Then one day the circus comes to town.

The ringmaster comes into the pub for a pint and the barman says to
him "You're with the circus, aren't you? Well, I know this duck
that could be just brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks beer,
eats sandwiches, reads the newspaper and everything!"

"Sounds marvelous," says the ringmaster, handing over his business
card. "Get him to give me a call."

So the next day when the duck comes into the pub the barman says,
"Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you up with a top job, paying
really good money."

"I'm always looking for the next job," says the duck. "Where is it?"

"At the circus," says the barman.

"The circus?" repeats the duck.

"That's right," replies the barman.

"The circus?" the duck asks again. "That place with the big tent?"

"Yeah," the barman replies.

"With all the animals who live in cages, and performers who live in
caravans?" says the duck.

"Of course," the barman replies.

"And the tent has canvas sides and a big canvas roof with a hole in
the middle?" persists the duck.

"That's right!" says the barman..

The duck shakes his head in amazement, and says ....

" What the hell would they want with a plasterer???.