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Old woodworkers joke
Jack, an older gentleman woodworker, feared his wife, Becky, was getting hard of hearing.
So one day Jack called her doctor to make an appointment to have her hearing checked. The Doctor made an appointment for a hearing test in two weeks, and said that meanwhile there's a simple informal test the husband could do to give the doctor some idea of the state of her problem.
Here's what you do, said the Doctor, "Start out about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.
That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he's in the living room. He thinks to himself that he is about 40 feet away. "Let's see what happens," he mutters.
Then in a normal tone he asks, ''Honey, what's for supper?" No response. So Jack moves to the other end of the room, about 30 feet from Becky and repeats, "Honey, what's for supper?"
Still no response.
Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from Becky and asks, "Honey, what's for supper?"
Again he gets no response.
So he walks up to the kitchen door, only 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?"<o></o>
Again there is no response. So he walks right up behind her.<o></o>>
"Honey, what's for supper?"
She replies, "For God's sake, Jack! For the FIFTH TIME. CHICKEN!"<o>></o>>
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Same woodworker went to the doctor complaining that he was suffering badly from flatulence.
"Don't know what is going on Doc, I'm farting almost constantly but they are silent and don't smell. In fact I've been farting since I got here. Never had anything like it."
The doctor gives him a prescription and sends him away.
A week later than man is back.
"Doctor, I don't know what those pills were supposed to do, but since I've been taking them I'm farting just as much, still silent, but by god they stink."
"Good," says the doctor, "that's fixed your sinus problems, now to do something about your hearing".
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