Positions Vacant

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24th February 2006, 08:59 AM
Howdya do that

Positions Vacant
In my dreams last night I won $2 million in the lottery so now we have a budget of $200,000 to build the ultimate forum members shed.
Applications should include but are not limited to:-
- Outlook on life
- Drinking habits
- Favourite foods
- Qualifications
Successful applicants will be invited to a 10 day fit-out of the shed as soon as I purchase the winning ticket.

Hours of work:-
Before 9am - Bacon, eggs, anything high in colesterol and contemplation of the days work ahead.
12 - 2pm - Pies, sausage rolls, hamburgers and procrastination over what to do next
6pm - late - BBQ, beers, red wine, Bundy, put s**t on each other and planning for the following day (There will a minimum alcohol consumption requirement before you may contribute)

On the eleventh day I will pay someone to complete what we have not:D :D :D :D :D
24th February 2006, 09:14 AM
Bodgy

Sounds like my sort of job, but could we add kidneys and black pudding to the breakfast menu and offer a decent Single Malt as an option with the Bundy?
24th February 2006, 01:03 PM
Termite

Well the 200 grand should see us out for the 10 days, what's your budget for the shed materials and machinery. :D
24th February 2006, 03:09 PM
Zed

there should be a pi$$taking instructional video included (with batteries).

combinations of machinary should be included - note "everything Felder" is not an acceptable response.
24th February 2006, 03:12 PM
Felder

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zed

combinations of machinary should be included - note "everything Felder" is not an acceptable response.

Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!:p:p:D;)

And I was going to donate all the machines so you could spend more money on food and booze!;)
24th February 2006, 04:32 PM
DanP

Sorright Brendan, Givvem to me.
24th February 2006, 11:28 PM
Driver

According to the Code of Practice (do a search!) there needs to be a set minimum amount of time in the schedule for the following vital blokely activities:-

1. Leaning.
2. Gazing and/or contemplating.
3. Standing and looking (not to be confused with 2).
4. Sitting and thinking (not to be confused with 2 or 3).

Equally, there needs to be (again, according to the Code of Practice), a schedule of acceptable blokes' drinks and due recognition of circumstances when chaps' drinks (do a search!) can be rendered acceptable due to an individual bloke's circumstances. In this way, gin and tonic - normally a rigidly defined chap's drink - can, when circumstances render the appropriate dispensation, be consumed by a bloke, in his shed, without any contravention of the Code of Practice.

Col