Football Again

Following the lead of Melbourne recruiting Jimmy Stynes in Ireland, the
Western Bulldogs recruiting scout returns from Kosovo raving
about a new teenage superstar that he's seen in the war-torn country. The
Bulldogs are so convinced by the scout and so desperate for no-one else to
snatch him up that they sign the boy right away.

The boy comes to Australia and arrives in Melbourne for Saturday's game
and is on the bench. With 10 minutes to go, one of the bulldogs, Chris Grant, gets
injured and is stretched from the ground. Terry Wallace points to the new boy
and says, "This is your big chance, son. Go out and do the business for us."

The lad takes off his tracksuit and takes to the field. In those dying
minutes he's a revelation, kicking 4 goals. The Bulldogs get up and win
the game and the crowd goes wild.

After the game Terry gives the new boy a big hug in the changing
rooms. "Great performance, son. Go and give your parents a ring at home,
they'll be so proud of you. You can use the phone in my office."

The lad goes into the coach's office and rings his Mum.
"Mum, I've just had the best day in my life on debut. I kicked 4
goals!!...You don't sound very happy though... why are you
crying? Is everything OK?"

"No, son. Today has been the worst in my life....Your Dad has
been shot, they've raped your sister and the house has been burned to the
ground."

"Oh no, Mum, that's terrible. I'm really sorry."

"Sorry? Sorry? So you should be! You're the reason we moved to
Footscray in the first place!"