The Dipso

(Not sure where I got this so apologies if it's already been posted.)

An elderly dipso staggers into a hardware store and asks for a bottle of methylated spirit.

"I'm not selling you meth!" the assistant exclaims. "You'll just take it to the park across the street and drink it!"

"No, no," says the old soak. "I've got myself a part-time job as a painter and decorator. I need the meth to clean my brushes and rollers."

The assistant is a bit dubious but decides to trust him and puts a bottle of meth on the counter.

The drunk picks it up and says, "Haven't you got a cold one?"

A belated Happy New Year to everyone.
Pete