The jewish quarterback

The coach had put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears. The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.

Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in the West Bank . In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Israeli soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away.

KABOOM!

He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.

KA-BLOOEY!

Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.

BULLS-EYE!

"I've got to get this guy!" Coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"

So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football.

And the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl.

The young man is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.

"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"

"I don't want to talk to you, the old woman says."You are no longer my son!"

"I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. "I've won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."

"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get bashed!"

The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says, "I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago!

Very good.
Actually, I was in Chicago last year and found the place & the people very friendly, but I was warned that there are some places where I shouldn't go. Never managed to find them.:D

We drove thru in 2016 in a motorhome with a Tassie front plate no probs.
Before we’d left Canada a mates wife had begged us not to go there.
Same with Detroit although we did come in thru Dearborn and the Henry Ford Museum.
H.

During the early 1970s I was offered a job in Chicago. I spent a lot of time looking at a variety of options and finally decided that if I took the job I would have to commute from Wisconsin. I took another job in the suburbs of Pittsburgh. I have been known to do some rather stupid things but the job in Pittsburgh turned out to be shear genius.

Stayed in Chicago for 3 weeks back in 2007 for work.

Have to admit, I was ignorant of what was said about it. I found it lovely. I walked everywhere and talked to great many people while doing so.

Found it very pleasant.

Perhaps being an Aussie gives us a free pass on things. The locals "leave us be"? I think we must give off a different vibe.

:)

Maybe they were so shocked by the accent they forgot to mug you ?

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Originally Posted by damian

Maybe they were so shocked by the accent they forgot to mug you ?

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My only recollection was that they were genuinely intrigued to talk to me. Even the street people, which there were so many as to boggle the mind, were incredibly friendly.

Spoze the fact that I'm "a big bastard" may have swayed them to investigate first ;) :)


On the homelessness, I was genuinely shocked at how bad it was. Decent people with no options. It left me thinking it wasn't a great system of governance that allowed it in such numbers. A poor reflection on the mindset of their form of capitalism.

The Government spend so much on fighting unnecessary wars, there's nothing left for the homeless!!!
Wars don't determine who's right or wrong, but who is left.....
Kryn

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Originally Posted by woodPixel

Spoze the fact that I'm "a big bastard" may have swayed them to investigate first ;) :)


On the homelessness, I was genuinely shocked at how bad it was. Decent people with no options. It left me thinking it wasn't a great system of governance that allowed it in such numbers. A poor reflection on the mindset of their form of capitalism.

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I'm 5'6" but apparently I terrify people. When I was young I used to go to music concerts. People used to ask my permission to do stuff. Apparently I give off a vibe of being in charge. Weird.

I am old enough to recall a time when there was basically no homelessness and poverty in Australia. My family were about as poor as people got but we mostly had a roof and usually got to eat every day. Hawke fixed all that.

Remember in a democracy you get the government you deserve. If the Americans didn't want what they have they could change it, and while their system isn't perfect ours isn't either.

My last operation october 30 was in a public hospital and I've been sucked into procedures all year in that system. I keep begging the doctors to put me back in private but they insist on "saving me money" (I self insure). Now look at how well our public education system is working....etc etc.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by damian

I'm 5'6" but apparently I terrify people. When I was young I used to go to music concerts. People used to ask my permission to do stuff. Apparently I give off a vibe of being in charge. Weird.

I am old enough to recall a time when there was basically no homelessness and poverty in Australia. My family were about as poor as people got but we mostly had a roof and usually got to eat every day. Hawke fixed all that.

Remember in a democracy you get the government you deserve. If the Americans didn't want what they have they could change it, and while their system isn't perfect ours isn't either.

My last operation october 30 was in a public hospital and I've been sucked into procedures all year in that system. I keep begging the doctors to put me back in private but they insist on "saving me money" (I self insure). Now look at how well our public education system is working....etc etc.

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"Let me take you by the hand
And lead you through the streets (of any major city in Australia)
And I will show you something
To make you change your mind.

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Remember in a democracy you get the government you deserve. If the Americans didn't want what they have they could change it, and while their system isn't perfect ours isn't either.

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I like the idea that some countries have, if the polly doesn't play the game for the people, he disappears!!!!!
If we had that here they might think twice about the way they treat our money????

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Originally Posted by KBs PensNmore

I like the idea that some countries have, if the polly doesn't play the game for the people, he disappears!!!!!

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Permanently?

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Originally Posted by rrich

Permanently?

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is there another form of disappear? :)

So is that what happened to Harold Holt?
Or was he hidden in the pool that bears his name?