PUN0GRAPHY

· I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
· When chemists die, they barium.
· Jokes about German sausage arethe wurst.
· A soldier who survived mustardgas and pepper spray isnow a seasoned veteran.
· I know a guy who's addicted tobrake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
· How does Moses make histea? Hebrews it.
· I stayed up all night to seewhere the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
· This girl said she recognized mefrom the vegetarian club,but I'd never met herbivore.
· I'm reading a book aboutanti-gravity. I can't put it down.
· I did a theatrical performanceabout puns. It was a play on words .
· They told me I had type A blood,but it was a type-O.
· This dyslexic man walks into abra .
· I didn't like my beard at first.Then it grew on me.
· A cross-eyed teacher lost herjob because she couldn't control her pupils?
· When you get a bladderinfection, urine trouble.
· What does a clock do when it'shungry? It goes back four seconds..
· I wondered why the ball wasgetting bigger. Then it hit me!
· Broken pencils are pointless.
· What do you call a dinosaur withan extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
· England has no kidney bank, butit does have a Liverpool .
· I used to be a banker, but thenI lost interest.
· I dropped out of communism classbecause of lousy Marx.
· All the toilets in London policestations have been stolen.
Police say they havenothing to go on.
· I took the job at a bakerybecause I kneaded dough.
· Velcro - what a rip off!
· Cartoonist found dead inhome. Details are sketchy.