The Saw. Last for 2013.

Chap had a very nice Shed. Had everything.
The Wife caught him in bed with a beautiful young woman.
Dragged him out by His Hair, to his Shed, Grabbed hold of His you know What, & proceeded to put it in the vice, wound it up real tight, with him screaming.
She grabbed a just, Sun. Market bought, Rusty Old Saw.
Your not going to cut it off are you Darling.
No, You are, She said, passing the Saw to Him
Why wood I do something as silly as that.
Because My Love, I'm going to Burn Down Your Shed ??.