Quotable quotes

[Tonyz]

about time we had a section where everyone can add to, we could even have 2 going at once , 1 here and 1 in the Open Slaughter section

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

There is no such thing as Gravity. The World sucks

What about some Classic Monty Python.

" I Fart in your direction, King Arthur "

" Is that all you've got "

" He's not the Messiah, He's a very naughty boy "

" Were not the Judean people's front. Were the Peoples front of Judea."

" Always look on the Bright side of life " - Whistle, Whistle.

" Were all impressed down here, I can tell you."

" Just one more Mint "

"The eyes are open, the mouth moves but Mr Brain has long since departed""

There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence

Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea.
Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it.

[damian]

The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence

One slash and you're ash....

[A Duke]

Hi,

"We are all here because we are not all there"

An inmate of a mental institution when they were asked if any of them knew why they were there.

Regards

[rustynail]

You well may think I am a nobody.
Well nobody's perfect.

[wood spirit]

Don't @#$% with the Romans - Jesus.

[wood spirit]

Was not aware of the censorship here -you get the gist

[rwbuild]

There is none so blind as those who will not see
There is none so deaf as those who will not hear
There is none so dumb as those who will not ask
And to dine alone is a heartless meal

Without troops all I command is my desk
Without communication all I command is my thoughts

You eat in the mess
You create the mess
You eat in the mess
You clean up the mess

[rrich]

I was used as a reference for a former employee.
My response was:
"He is very smart at what he is dumb at."
The HR person was exceptionally confused. I explained, "When he don't know, he asks questions."

BTW - I would rather have 10 like him rather than one that knows it all.

[A Duke]

Over population is everybody's baby.

[Chesand]

Never start an argument that you know you can't win.

Once I thought I was wrong but I was mistaken.

[rwbuild]

Its only heavy while your holding it

[damian]

Never start an argument that you know you can't win.

So never argue with a woman then ?

[Bushmiller]

Never pick up a woman before noon, if she was any good she would still be in bed.

Hugh!!!

That is very non PC!

But you are allowed under the rule that anybody growing up before PC was invented can continue in the fashion to which they have become accustomed. Besides which there may be an element of truth. :)

Somewhere I have a book of Mae West quotes. There was some interesting reading there like the time she returned to her dressing room to find a dozen men waiting for her.

She leaned nonchalantly against the door jamb with one hand on the unsupported hip, gyrating provocatively and said,

"Well boys. I'm feeling a little tired this evening. One uv you's gonna haff to leave!"

Regards
Paul

[Bernmc]

<!--?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?-->People Who Say It Cannot Be Done Should Not Interrupt Those Who Are Doing It (?GB Shaw)

[A Duke]

Tobe happy for the rest of your life, make an ugly woman your wife.
:wink:

[rrich]

Over population is everybody's baby.




Hugh!!!

That is very non PC!

But you are allowed under the rule that anybody growing up before PC was invented can continue in the fashion to which they have become accustomed. Besides which there may be an element of truth. :)

Regards
Paul

That isn't an element, it is the whole periodic table.

[verawood]

The only thing you should have absolute faith in is skepticism

[ubeaut]

From my army days:

Who called the cook a :censored2:? Who called the :censored2: a cook?

Greatcoats on.... Greatcoats off.... Repeat!

A sign on the back wall of the transport shed read:
IN CASE OF NUCLEAR EXPLOSION
Assume a crouching position.
Put your head between your knees
and kiss your :censored2: goodbye.

Censored by me to set an example. Yeah right... No honest.... Hehehe https://www.ubeaut.biz/mhihi.gif

[A Duke]

From my army days:

Who called the cook a :censored2:? Who called the :censored2: a cook?

Greatcoats on.... Greatcoats off.... Repeat!

A sign on the back wall of the transport shed read:
IN CASE OF NUCLEAR EXPLOSION
Assume a crouching position.
Put your head between your knees
and kiss your :censored2: goodbye.

Censored by me to set an example. Yeah right... No honest.... Hehehe https://www.ubeaut.biz/mhihi.gif

Hi,
Well you would not want to get it moved to "Open slather", where only the dirty dozen would read it, would you?
Regards